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Lessons from Burundi: Comedy Season


Where I come from, we have an influx of foreigners. Already, we have an area by the name Congo, named so because it had an influx of Bakongo refugees, fleeing the war in their country… Congo, Zaire and back to DRC… The Democratic Republic of Congo. Very soon, we might have areas such as Sudan (South), Burundi, Rwanda, etc., etc. Fun fact, Dynamiq, He of ‘Remember them Days in Nairobi’ used to be our neighbour in Coast.

Anyway, these Burundian have taken over the groundnut and the coffee (and KDF – the gluten stomach holder) hawking business. On their part, their Rwandan neighbours have taken over the phone accessories’ hawking business, almost as if by some tacit agreement – bilateral trade agreement or something. The Burundians, night and day, they trade, huge flasks of ready coffee, the mwananchi version, and buckets of said body-building, economic-miracle-worker, KDF in tow.

Ever been served by a Ugandan lady? Down on their knees, submissive service that will have you selling your left kidney for a million bucks and handing over the dollars to them. Well, these Burundians give you the male-version of it. As in, very courteous in how they serve you, plus receiving the money with both hands in a very humble way, as if you are doing them a favour. Plus, they thank you – a rare trait in Nairobians – after the transaction. Also, they greet you before the transaction… Nairobi business community won’t know what hit them, as these Burundians do the full Customer Experience voodoo on their clients.  Very soon, they have one (previously a Chai Guevara aficionado) drinking coffee four or five times in a day.

I did get to talk to one of them, research for how to get me a Burundian wife. Ah, Kenya, the land of opportunity! On a good day, the guy makes a cool 2K, tax free. What’s not to like about Kenya? Peaceful country, discounting the ‘maandamano’ shenanigans that shake things up once in a while. A hospitable people. A corrupt police force/kanjo. A populace with loose money to spend despite economic upheavals… in short, the African Canaan… But Kenyans do complain a lot.  This particular Burundian, he came to Kenya with nothing, but he is on the verge of marrying Shiru from Uthiru… You Kenyans, so much to be grateful for.

Anyway, after this talk, I decided to ‘kujituma’ – get out of my comfort zone. Do things I have always been afraid of doing. Meet new people with new ways of thinking. Seek opportunities where there seems to be no way. Obliterate the tunnel and have the light all around me.

Baba tembea, tembea nami
Usiku wa kiza, tembea nami
Jua lichomozapo, lituapo
Kusini, kaskazini, magharibi, mashariki
Katika misimu yote Baba
Elohi nakusihi, tembea nami.

(Father walk with me
In the dark of night, walk with me
As the sun shines and sets
In the South and North, West to East
In all seasons Father
Elohim I beseech, walk with me)

So? I’ve purposed to challenge me to become a world-class comedian, artiste and writer. .. I’ll not always be at my best, but henceforth, I’ll be failing forward. Down below is me doing my prelim try-outs as a comedian courtesy of Standup Collective: For the Sophisticated mind. Plus, I have lined the following book titles for launch in August: ‘A Funeral Dress for Nyasuguta’, ‘Love Told, Poetry Souled, Family Bold’, ‘Kombo Mkosa Kabila’ – then there is the first worship experience single ‘Elohi Tembea Nami’. Keep visiting for updates on these. Ahsante! 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDq4psnubfQ

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